TAKE ME TO THE TUNNEL!

It's that crazy pre-holiday time of tying up the loose ends before leaving home.  Tomorrow we go through the Tunnel at 9.00am and drive to Neuchatel just inside the Swiss border.  Just the thought of going through the Tunnel is actually much more exciting than the actual experience.  A bit like "Alice in Wonderland", or "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe", whether it be rabbit holes or wardrobes, or indeed 20th century tunnels, it has to lead to something out of the ordinary and exciting.  I love the Tunnel - it makes Europe feel just there, within a tantalisingly easy grasp, much more so than the disassociated and disheartening experience of air travel.  As Anthony is fond of quoting "aeroplane travel is for those that can afford the time".  So by this time tomorrow we will have left the Tonka Toy and Lego landscape of post-harvest Hampshire behind us. The towering structures of giant straw bales and the continual hum of tractors and trailers busying about the lanes will be replaced with lofty peaks and gentle meadows - hopefully bathed in soft autumn sunshine, and not glimpsed occasionally through drifting rain and fog!  Still nervous after our last disastrous "Indian summer" epic when we took to sea in the aftermath of Cycline Katya, I have been watching the Swiss weather forecasts with almost OCD type tendencies - occasional showers is what they are forecasting at the moment - I can live with that.

MEN ARE FROM MARS WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS

Mars versus Venus is what springs to mind as I survey the "preliminary packing" which is turning the spare bedroom into a bomb site.

Venus (Georgi)  - several different "hiking outfit" options are strewn across the bed.  (A)  the "feeling good day" option being the rather short stretchy khaki skirt last worn in outback Australia, where well tanned legs covered a multitude of sins and anything with sleeves on was considered being overdressed (b) the definitely "fat-girl day" shorts with voluminous legs, loose waist band and which hang off my backside like a wet nappy, but hey, you can't see me underneath so you can just keep guessing! and (c) the only purpose built bit of hiking gear - Peter Storm walking trousers bought so many years ago I can't remember why in an attractive goose-poo green with fetching gathered waistband, perfect for those days when you are beyond caring!   Hmmmmm, it's going to be a tough call each morning just getting dressed!

Haute couture aside, I have a practical streak, and have packed a First Aid kid, consisting of various blister avoidance potions, and pain killers.  Oh, and more pain killers.......

Mars (Anthony) - one bottle of gin, one bottle of whiskey, a case of small cans of tonic water, a compass, and some waterproofing for boots.

So that's it - I guess we're ready to go!